Talk It Over... With Yourself
My wife and I have this running joke: she sees me as always seeing sunny clouds and having happy thoughts, while she tends to see thunder and lightning in circumstances. However, the reality is that we both are very positive people, but (and I can only talk for myself now) my happy disposition does not come without work: I have had to work on it for many years. What I have learned over the past many years is the power of being positive (positive outlook, counting my blessings, and understanding that I can learn).
One of the most important tools I have in aiding me to keep positive is self-talk. Now, this can be disturbing for others who accidentally discover me talking to myself somewhere, but I have to be honest here, I do it, and I have found it useful. The aspect of positive self-talk and its effects on our well-being is actually not new by any means. I have been fortunate enough to be a part of a Higher Order Performance (HOP) program this past year (run by Mr. Corey Sigvaldson) and, as part of that group, we have taken a look at the aspect of neurobiology (how the mind and the body are connected). One of the main teachings of the program is the aspect of GRIT (as explained by Angela Duckworth's book of the same name). In general, grit can be defined as passion and persistence to create long term goals. As I explored this concept, I came to the realization that grit is completely connected to how we learn in general, and how important it is for school administrators to cultivate grit.
To start, the first and most important idea is to understand the importance of being open and honest with ourselves, especially when it comes to our faults (ask anyone who has battled with any addiction how important this first step is). Administrators must remember that the job does not define them (we are not run by the job itself), and that the job does require making hard decisions at times, and true it is the administrator who will have to make those choices. However, we must be cognizant of the fact that hiring, firing, or doing your job should never be taken personally; it is simply part of the job. If we do begin to take it personally, it will begin to create negative feelings about ourselves ("I am not a good person; I am mean I am only focused on money; I am hard to please" ;etc.). Because this task is a part of the job itself, administrators will have to do it repeatedly, and that can begin to reinforce negative self thoughts. Ultimately, this can cause burnout, anger, frustration, and even stress created physical ailments. To combat this trend, starting your day off positively will help to successfully navigate your way through the tough decisions and will give you the physical wherewithal to make it happen when it needs to happen. Important here is the aspect of seeing your job long term; playing the "long game" when it comes to our jobs is an important part of keeping correct perspective. Izzy Hamptonstone, in her book Hockey Confidence, writes that "taking the time to look at a challenge over a longer period of time opens your mind to new ways of seeing solutions" (2016).
If we look at our job with a longer perspective than simply days or weeks at a time, we build the framework for allowing self-talk and positive thinking to change the way we work and tackle problems. How? By giving us time to train our brain; in essence, to learn. In the book The Social Neuroscience of Education, by Louis Cozolino, the author writes that "learning is believed to occur through changes in the connectivity among neurons in response to stimulation. Repeated firing of two adjacent neurons results in metabolic changes in both cells, resulting in an increased efficiency of their joint activation" (2013). Thus, the process for creating newer ways of thinking and acting that last will always be as follows: start it once and then repeat it over and over. This will first create the new neural pathways and then reinforce them by coating those bonds in Myelin. It is these myelin coated bonds that last.
Therefore, to go back to the original concept, beginning a process of starting your day off with positive self talk (and perhaps other positive things, such as exercise) can and will aid administrators (or any leader actually) in having the tools, the strength, and the mental hardness, to do the job and do it well.
Therefore, to go back to the original concept, beginning a process of starting your day off with positive self talk (and perhaps other positive things, such as exercise) can and will aid administrators (or any leader actually) in having the tools, the strength, and the mental hardness, to do the job and do it well.
